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<h1><a href="https://archiveofourown.org/works/25809406">Letter to the Readers/Hiatus announcement</a> by <a class='authorlink' href='https://archiveofourown.org/users/ZoneRobotnik/pseuds/ZoneRobotnik'>ZoneRobotnik</a></h1>

<table class="full">

<tr><td><b>Category:</b></td><td>Original Work</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Genre:</b></td><td>this isn't a story</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Language:</b></td><td>English</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Status:</b></td><td>Completed</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Published:</b></td><td>2020-08-09</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Updated:</b></td><td>2020-08-11</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Packaged:</b></td><td>2021-05-05 11:28:40</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Rating:</b></td><td>Not Rated</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Warnings:</b></td><td>No Archive Warnings Apply</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Chapters:</b></td><td>2</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Words:</b></td><td>707</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Publisher:</b></td><td>archiveofourown.org</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Story URL:</b></td><td>https://archiveofourown.org/works/25809406</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Author URL:</b></td><td>https://archiveofourown.org/users/ZoneRobotnik/pseuds/ZoneRobotnik</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Summary:</b></td><td><div class="userstuff">
              <p>Because just sticking it on one fic isn't enough.</p>
            </div></td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Comments:</b></td><td>5</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Kudos:</b></td><td>14</td></tr>

</table>

<a name="section0001"><h2>1. Chapter 1</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>I have something I need to tell everyone.<br/>I think you all deserve to know.<br/>I have been lying to you.<br/>I am not a good person.<br/>I'm not a bad person, either, I don't think, but I'm...I'm unstable.<br/>I let my emotions run my life and I have hurt people by it. I hurt my friends, I hurt my husband, my family. And I don't know why I'm like this.<br/><br/>I was homeschooled and terribly sheltered growing up, and all my attempts at attending a brick and mortar school have all ended up with me gaining social anxiety. My sisters managed to adapt, but I somehow am incapable of doing so. I know the difference between fiction and reality, but I have always felt more comfortable in a fictional world, in someone else’s life, than in real life. And whenever I meet someone new online, I automatically assume they are close to my age.<br/><br/>And, as a result, I thoughtlessly suggest things that may be inappropriate to the situation and when things go badly, I lash out. Yesterday, I made a big mistake and made a callout about a minor that I had a social failure with. A social failure caused by my assuming they were my age and not bothering to double-check. A callout caused by my unstable emotions.<br/><br/>People reacted badly to it.<br/><br/>You know that little voice that tells you to quit when you're ahead? I apparently don't have one. Things were said, arguments were had, I lost friends. I hurt people. I was wrong, and bad. And I couldn't stop. I had my husband and my sister telling me to stop, but I couldn't stop. And that's all on me. I was so driven by my emotions and was determined to clear my name and I just kept digging a deeper and deeper hole for myself until I was buried.<br/><br/>I tried to apologize, twice, but they were full of bitterness. I finally tried a third time and...well, no one's told me off for it, but I've also gotten no response. I'm...sort of taking it as a good thing.<br/><br/>But, the reason I am telling you all this is because I'm going to be taking a hiatus to figure out myself and...find out what's wrong with me. Why am I completely unable to adapt to reality like my sisters have? Why am I such a mess?<br/><br/>I hope that I can one day be forgiven for my mistakes, but right now I can't focus on my fics, on my art, on anything. I hope that, when I come back, I'll have become a better person.<br/><br/>I wish yesterday never happened, but it did. I wish I was more stable, but I'm not. I have some serious issues I need to work through, and I can't do that by burying it in fanfics anymore. Varian and Gideon and anyone else can't take the brunt of my mental problems anymore. I made a mistake and I can't redeem myself until I ensure it doesn't happen again. I need to find the root and follow it to what I am now and cut it off or find a way to heal.<br/><br/>So, this is my hiatus announcement. If you’re still here when I get back, I hope you enjoy the continuations of my fics. But I understand if you, considering everything, decide to leave.<br/><br/>Until then,<br/>Zone</p>
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<a name="section0002"><h2>2. Update on hiatus</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>After taking some time to self-reflect, with some painful, suppressed things coming to light about my past, I have decided that I am ready to move on past everything and try to be a better person and keep bringing you guys the stories that you all love. Honestly, I'm surprised that you're still here, after the bullshit I pulled. Pleasantly surprised, but surprised. <br/><br/>Anyways, I'm updating this to let you guys know that my hiatus will be ending next week. I'm taking the rest of this week for family and to celebrate my mother's birthday, and then it's back to business as usual. Thanks for being patient and putting up with me. I'll try to avoid doing anything like that again. That was just unpleasant for all of us...<br/><br/>See you next week!<br/><br/>Zone</p>
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